at 05/04/11 4:40PM
Where man doesn't have comforting tools of false security like employment protection laws, where man can't pretend that he knows his company will even last through next week.
We are individuals more than we were, fighting to stay upright in a leaking boat. The forces of up and down in balance, and like a car being passed, look out your window- though it seems you are drifting backwards- you're not. You're just managing to stay in place and that is what you can hope for from now on.
at 06/28/10 9:27PM
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In some places, a sketchy business can be spotted pretty quickly with two characterizations....no website and located in someone's house.
In Lancaster, FIND me a business that has a fancy website and isn't located "in the back," and I'll show you an extravagant wastrel with too much time and money than is good for man.
In some places, even in the countryside, you can take a road based on its cardinal direction and work your way across the gorgeous grid of golden grain with a hop and a skip
In Lancaster, the eastward encroachment of the Appalachians applies torque to the highways, twisting the grid into a diamond helix corkscrew. Believe it or not, I drove in a straight line for 12 minutes and rear ended my own truck.
In some places, two lanes means two columns of cars. ONLY. Shoulders are right out.
In Lancaster, two lanes means a fluctuating situation of up to four columns of vehicles, some of them being horse-drawn. Shoulders are first come first serve around any impediment, and its actually considered rude and bad tempered NOT to squeeze as close as possible to the center line if you want to turn left so as to allow at least a full column of traffic on the right.
In some places, in the case of construction relegating all traffic to one lane, the last 400 yards before the reduction is crampacked with every citizen from the surrounding area that can still see at least shadows.
In Lancaster, a full mile before the lane reduction, everyone is neatly and patiently in the reduced lane purposefully ignoring the wide open spaces adjacent to their delightful game of stop and go. IF any ignorant personage who must not have had a mother EVER takes advantage of this lane, multiple Individuals Of Justice will intervene by driving in the W.O.S (wide open spaces) at the appropriately slow rate to save the rest of us the trauma of being passed by free and wicked spirits.
at 05/30/10 2:31PM
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He was afraid....Then he waited seven days, according to the time set by Momma. But Momma did not come to Gilgathroom. So Saul upon his throne said unto himself, "bring unto me the toilet paper." And he wiped (or not) his own sucio. Now it happened, as soon as he had finished wiping his own sucio, that the Momma of God came; and Saul ran out to meet him, that he might greet him. And the Momma of God said, "What have you done? Who wiped the sucio?" Saul said, "When I wad on da botty, I did it." The Momma of God said to Saul, "you have done foolishly. You have not kept the commandment of the Amy your Momma. For now the Momma would have established you upon the throne forever, But now your kingdom shall not continue. It shall be given to your sister. And there was much lamentation....weeping....and rolling on the floor.
Let that be a lesson to you.
*Note: Momma of God is not, 'mother of God,' but rather like a 'child of God'
at 05/18/10 8:03PM
"Momma, K's getting REALLY BIG boogers!"
"When I went to Aunt Amanda's house we saw a BUG!" (she meant buggy....horse buggy)
(A mother) "Come on Tommy, lets go!" (Tommy to his mother and me) "No! My girlfriend!"
(Tommy to me) "Will, will, will you hewp me wi my memy bersus?"
at 04/28/10 5:22PM
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except for most of the time when it won't. See... people (aka....*delete bitter diatribe*) SAY "you'll be glad you did" and "just you wait and see how great things turn out."
Faith: when you grit your teeth and just make the decision to do what you think is right, knowing that YOUR injuries from 'the right thing' will be the least of your troubles, what with the hurt friends, the torn apart families, the ensuing chaos (NOT an exaggeration, for all you hopeless optimists out there). Oh yes sunshine and rainbows.....and then of course comes the learning that your conscience was faulty, that you shouldn't have done it and what were you thinking, and the desperately trying to learn from it so your conscience can make a DIFFERENT erroneous conclusion next time, resulting in horrible collateral damage that begins to heap up in your soul and make you hope so deeply that you truly won't have to give an account for good intentioned bad decisions.
And then SOMETIMES, every so often, you gird your loins, prepare everyone for the incoming onslaught of lashing consequences you feel ridiculously obliged to herald by the dictates of your conscience....spread the word to duck and cover.... clinch your jaw......and..... nothing happens.
And then the rush of...did I actually get it right? was it just chance? is this some new form of temptation? what is GOING ON??? whatever....Thank God. Amazing that we actually deserve and mostly create all the stress and all the pain in our own lives, that even with a beautiful motive all wrapped in silk bows we still can't get it right, and that we somehow get into heaven anyway...
I don't bring up the various bible verses because they seem pretty equally divided between, 'your life will be horrible' and 'you will receive your earthly reward,' and my favorite 'you won't be able to tell what God's thinking from earthly events'