Being a dad rocks!

Hello everyone. I have a bit of good news. I may be coming home earlier than I anticipated. I might be leaving this place in roughly 3-3 1/2 weeks. I may be flying back to the states on the 2nd of March. I will find out this coming week the exact date. Standby for more!

Hey it's been a while since I wrote on here. I guess a lot has happened since then. I know now that I am going to be the father of a little boy. As I am sure all of you already know his name is Andrew. I am so ready to come home and leave this God forsaken country. I am going to have so many stories to tell when I get back. I look forward to seeing everyone at church again. I sure do miss all of you.

:Homeward Bound:

In the quiet misty morning when the moon has gone to bed,
When the sparrows stop their singing and the sky is clear and red.
When the summer’s ceased its gleaming,
When the corn is past its prime,
When adventure’s lost its meaning,
I’ll be homeward bound in time.

Bind me not to the pasture, chain me not to the plow.
Set me free to find my calling and I’ll return to you somehow.

If you find it’s me you're missing, if you’re hoping I’ll return.
To your thoughts I’ll soon be list’ning, and in the road I’ll stop and turn.
Then the wind will set me racing as my journey nears its end.
And the path I’ll be retracing when I’m homeward bound again.

Bind me not to the pasture, chain me not to the plow.
Set me free to find my calling and I’ll return to you somehow.

In the quiet misty morning when the moon has gone to bed,
When the sparrows stop their singing,
I’ll be homeward bound again.

Until then...I love you so much Kym and to Andrew or Chloe, your daddy loves you too.

Do you ever get bored at work? Do you find yourself staring at a cubical wall for 30-45 minutes with absolutley nothing to do? Do you find yourself daydreaming at the office? Look no further then, I've compiled a list of things to pass the time.

THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

Blink wildly and then close your eyes really tight for an interesting light show
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out shapes and see if your subconscious is trying to send you a message (perhaps that funny shape is saying, 'send all your paychecks to Philip so I can get a Playstation 3')

See how long you can hold a note
(Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes)
Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend, or try to beat your own personal best. Inhale deeply and then try and make a noise for as long as you can. Earn extra points for making your partner laugh or ending on an amusing note.

Try to not think about penguins
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
This is especially hard, because by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about penguins anyway.

Use your secret mind power
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Pick a passing by and try to use your mind power to command them do something, like drop their bag or knock into someone. The law of averages dictates that sooner or later one of your mind commands will come true, so you can convince yourself that you really have super human powers and waste even more time trying them out.

Pretend you're a robot
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Walk down the street with mechanical movements, adding 'zzzzzt' sounds with each motion. Pretending to have a motor broken in, say, your left hand can add at least 30 seconds more entertainment.

Scratch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Go ahead, scratch yourself now. Even if nothing itches, go ahead. Doesn't that feel pretty good?

Rate passers by
(Amusement Potential: 10-15 minutes)
Secretly award passers by marks out of ten as you go along, offering (unsaid) expert criticism over their clothing, hairstyle and footwear choices.

Repeat the same word over and over until it loses its meaning
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Pick a random word out of a magazine and say it aloud to yourself until it becomes a meaningless set of noises.

Pinch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
What is pain? Why is it unpleasant? There's nothing physical about it - it's all in your mind. Plus, after pinching yourself for awhile, boredom will seem nice next to being in pain.

Try and sound Welsh
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
The key to sounding Welsh is to make sure that your voice goes up at the end of the sentence, so that everything sounds like a question. Throw in a superfluous 'isn't it?' at the end of everything you say and you're halfway there. Isn't it?

Stare at the back of someone's head until they turn around
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
This works on the "I have the feeling I'm being watched" principle. Conduct an experiment-does this really work?

Have a "Who is less competitive" competition
wonder (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Trying to win at this will make you lose. Trying to lose makes you win which makes you lose. Not trying at all makes you lose which makes you win which makes you lose.

Pick up a dog so it can see things from your point of view
(Amusement Potential: 3-5 minutes)
Think about it: your dog has only seen the house from a viewpoint from 6" to 2' high (15 to 60 cm for all you metric fans). It's never seen the tops of counters, what you keep on your desk, the tops of shelves, etc. Try looking at things from its point of view, too.

Pull out a hair, stick in someone's ear
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
Best done to sleeping people. Added challenge in having no one else around, because then you can't blame it on anyone else. Try to beat your record number of times before the person catches on.

Pour water in hand, make sneeze noise, throw water on back of person's neck
(Amusement Potential: 5-15 minutes)
Always a good gag. For an even bigger reaction out of the person, act like you're not sorry at all for what they think you did. Comment instead on how big that sneeze was or about how there was a lot of mucus in that one

Knight yourself
(Amusemnt Potential: Instantaneous)

Vacuum your lawn
(Amusement Potential: 0)

Drink straight shots...of water
(Amusement Potential: 2-3 minutes)
Usually works best when you are alrady thirsty.

Sweat
(Amusement Potential: Variable)
Since you must already be active in order for this to occur depending on your physical fitness this could have zero amusement value or endless value. If you do this please see the above...

Start something

Stop something

Try to join Hell's Angels by mail
If you do this make sure to not give a return address

Be a square root

Ask stupid questions
This could be potentially life threatening. If you ask dumb questions be prepared to deal with the consequences.

Learn everything there is to know about the Holy Roman Empire
(I actually did this one)...http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Roman_Empire

Request covert assistance from the CIA...(on anything)

And last but certainly not least...Increase your territorial holdings by force

If you actually took the time out of your day to read all of this nonsense, may God have mercy on your soul. If you did read all of it you must really be needing something to do and on a final note, congratulations you've successfully lost about 4-5 mintuts off your life that you will never get back by reading this.