Good Afternoon Everyone,

I know it has been an awful long time since I have posted anything, but I guess I haven't had anything good to post in a while.

But this morning at church, one of our members preached and hit home with something that has been weighing on my heart for quite some time now. This morning's service was titled "Death & Dying". Below are some of my thoughts about death, and my thoughts about it. I wrote these questions as they came to me at church this morning.


Daniel 12:2
And many of those who sleep in the dust of the earth shall awake,
Some to everlasting life,
Some to shame and everlasting contempt.


"Anytime someone tries to air condition Hell, they are getting ready to move in."
What that means, is when someone is trying to downplay the torments of Hell, it's obvious that they are just trying to convince themselves it won't be that bad.


1) How old will I be in Heaven?

There is a good question; will be stay the same age in Heaven as when we died? How will that process work when he make it upstairs?


2) How old will I be when I die?

Will I make it to 23 years old? How about 83 years old? There are people here on Earth I love, and I want to spend my time with. But if they die and leave me alone, I'm not sure I would want to live to be 83 years old. Then think of the associated heath problems. I've already got diabetes, at 83 years old, what else would happen? Would I even make it that long?


3) Will my loved ones be with me?

There is certain people, and one person in particular, I want to see in Heaven with me. I want to see them right now actually. Some are dead, some still are alive. But when I make it to Heaven, will they remember me? Will they know who I am? What would be the point in Heaven if when I got there, no one knew each other? I don't want to get to Heaven, and not know who my family was. I want to know my wife, family, friends, etc.


4) Will I have truly lived my life?

When I die, I want to know I have truly lived my life. I want to know I enjoyed it, made the best of it. I hope to one day get married, have children, and live a good life. Most importantly I want to know when it comes my time to clock out, that I have lived how I wanted to, loved, and made others happy.


5) Will I have fulfilled my goals and dreams?

I guess that question kind is kind of answered in question four. I have goals and dreams I want to accomplish before I die, and there is no time like the present to start on them, because I don't know how long I have left. I want to know my "bucket list" got completed.


6) Will the ones I've hurt forgive me?

Throughout my life I have managed to hurt people. Not intentionally of course, but fact of the matter is I have broken a few hearts, not always kept my word, and hurt some people I know, or knew. Good friend of mine died from cancer two years ago. I told her I would go by the next day to see her. I got busy and I was not able to, the day after that she passed away. I certainly hope she forgives me for that. If I had known that I never would have saw her again, I never would have left.

That goes for everyone though, the people I hurt, some I can not apologize to. Those people I hope forgive me for my transgressions. As for the still living people I have hurt, I have asked for forgiveness, where forgiveness has been due. I'm not a perfect person, but I try hard to live right, to be a man of God. Sometimes I feel like I have failed tragically.


7) The ones I could not save, what will they say to me?

In the job I have in the public safety field, unfortunately I have not always been able to save the lives of people I have worked on. When I make it to Heaven, what will they say to me? Will they be upset or angry? Will they forgive me? Everyone I work on, I try my hardest and give them the best level of care I can provide. There have been many times I have placed my life on the line to attempt to save a life. Some I have saved, but some I have not been able to save.

I live with a lot of horrible memories no one should have to remember. I pulled a man from a burning truck once, he was a drug dealer and wrecked his truck on a country road around 3 am one morning. It was near my house and I was able to get there quickly and pull him out of the vehicle. He was burned, cut up bad, and unresponsive. A medical helicopter set down and flew him to a trauma center, where he recovered.

But on the same hand, I was once on my way home from town when I heard a call come out of a house fire, with a couple trapped inside. I was two streets up and was on scene after thirty seconds of receiving the call. The whole house was on fire, just engulfed. I knew they were dead but alas I tried going inside through a bedroom window. No air pack or anything to protect myself. Unfortunately I could not locate them, they were in another bedroom that was inaccessible. I had to turn around because of the super toxic and hot smoke and flames, it is the hardest thing in my life that I have had to do, and probably always will be.

I used to blame myself, but a chaplain from a metropolitan fire department around here counseled me a lot and helped me get over it. Nothing I could have done differently would have mattered and it took a long time to realize that. But what if I meet them in Heaven? What will they saw to me, what will they think? That bothers me sometimes. Some things will continue to haunt me, for the rest of my days.


But that is just a few thoughts from this morning I was thinking about. I have been thinking about this for a while now. Today I was able to get some scriptures to read and help me find answers to these questions. I will post the scriptures another time.


Drew

Good evening everyone!!!

Well two important dates are upcoming: Thanksgiving and my brother’s wedding!

First of all, I hope everyone has a very happy Thanksgiving. Each Thanksgiving I always find some reason to be thankful for the good things in my life, and this Thanksgiving, I urge everyone else to do the same. And not to be a hypocrite, here is a few reasons I am thankful for all God has blessed me with in my life.

I have been blessed with my good friends I have, especially Jennifer. I am also thankful for my job, for my health, and my family.

No matter what we may be going through, we can always find a reason to be happy and thankful.

So my brother is getting married this Saturday at 2 pm; Jennifer and myself are going to pick my tux up tomorrow. I don’t normally dress up in a penguin suit, but special occasions though are cool I suppose. I’ll be sure to upload some pictures after the wedding for everyone to see.

But everyone have a happy Thanksgiving and a good rest of your week. As my buddy at work says, LOVE PEACE AND CHICKEN GREASE!

Well as most of us figured, Barack Obama has made history by being elected President of the United States of America.

I went to bed around 8:45 pm last night, very fatigued after only getting two hours of sleep that day. I woke up this morning and heard on the radio, “current time is 7:49 am, maybe Sarah Palin will have another bid at the White House in four years. If you haven’t heard, Barack Obama is the President-Elect, willing after a landslide last night.”

So say a prayer, because I have a gut feeling that the next four years will be as bad as the last four years, if not worse. “God bless America”, we need a blessing.


Ever heard the song “My Beautiful Rescue”? I was watching music videos on youtube.com and stumbled upon it. I’ve never heard the song on any radio stations, but none-the-less, it’s still rather good. Just go to youtube.com and search “My Beautiful Rescue”.

Ever met people who remind you of someone else, of another place and time? I was talking to a friend of mine and we got to talking about illnesses. She told me she had lupus, and some of the problems that occur with that particular illness, and it reminded me of Michelle.

I don’t talk about Michelle much, some of you all may know of her. She was my best friend, and girl friend, who passed away a few years ago form lupus. I knew my friend had told me about being sick off and on, but when she told me it was lupus, it just kind of shocked me. I didn’t know that anyone else I knew was afflicted by that illness.

It briefly took me to a flashback of the past, to another place in time, with Michelle. Sometimes it’s smells, music, movies, little things that remind me of her. Other times it is people, but I have yet to meet someone else who had her illness. It saddens me that my friend has this illness, but I can relate to this person, maybe that is one of the many reasons I met Michelle.

I think about her often, her family and I still talk, I wonder from time to time if she thinks about me in Heaven. I bet she’s probably still taking it all in. Just imagine the beauty of Heaven, meeting Jesus face to face, how wonderful, amazing, that would be. Someone once write in a song, “only the good die young”, I believe it.

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On another note, made it home from Pittsburgh, PA safely. Got lost in a WV coal mining town at like 4 am... It was spooky. Also the yankees up there have no idea what okra is... yeah. Needless to say if I never visit that town again I won't lose any sleep.

I am leaving for Pittsburg, PA when I get off work at 11 PM tonight.

If you need anything give me a call on my cell or e-mail me (my phone automatically receives my e-mail).

I will be back Monday night and will psot photos up while on my trip.

God bless you all!!!!