Come see me there. www.facebook.com/RyanLHammond

I have defected and gone to myspace. come visit me there

http://www.myspace.com/loopysworld

At work, bored out of my skull. sorry it's ben so long since I updated, but things have been kinda hectic lately and haven't had time. Anyone that cares, call me, I need a little good news and hearing from friends seems to do that. Haven't heard from my family and I miss them, but life is easier with no drama, especially from parents in particular. Being one makes me entitled to say this...

"Parents let your children make their own mistakes, especially when you don't agree with them. They can never learn if they don't make any, and afterward they tend to believe you more about the wisdom you offer them."

I am not upset nor do I have any "hard feelings" I just wish that we could just get along and be a family again.

Hasta Lasagna!

The Bad Parrot.

Mary received a parrot as a gift. The parrot was fully grown with a very bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was a curse: those that weren't curses were to say the least, rude.

Mary tried to change the bird's attitude by constantly saying polite things. Words and playing soft music...anything she could think of. Nothing worked.

She yelled at the bird and the bird got worse. She shook the bird and the bird got madder and more rude. Finally in a moment of desperation, Mary put the parrot in the freezer to get a minute of peace.

For a few moments she heard the bird swearing, squawking kicking and screaming and then, suddenly there was absolute quiet. Mary was frightened that she might have actually hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door. The parrot calmly stepped out onto Mary's extended arm and said:

"I'm very sorry that I offended you with my language and my actions and I ask your forgiveness. I will endeavor to correct my behavior and I am sure it will never happen again."

Mary was astounded at the changes in the bird's attitude and was about to ask what had changed him, when the parrot continued, "May I ask what the chicken did?"

The Bad Parrot 2

Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check." "Oh, by the way don't worry about my bulldog. He won't bother you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!" "I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!"

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he has ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.

The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling.

Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled, "Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!"

To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"

Now isn't that funny? I think I had that bird when I was working on computers several years ago. :)

I understand what Colin is beginning to go thru. It's been 12 years since I had my first real, full-time, "gotta-go-to-work-or-I-can't-eat" job. I have just always done what i had to. I realize now that the only way I put up with it is by getting together with my buds on some night of the week and RPG'ed so that I could get away from my "real-life" and been something/someone else, that, I could never be.

However I am now faced with a choice. I want to eat the Pringles(R) and Coke(R), turn on the PS2(R)/XBOX(R)/Gamecube(R)/PC and play till i can't keep my eyes open.

What I need to do is I NEED to get in shape, and put down the Pringles(R) and Coke(R), turn off the PS2(R)/XBOX(R)/Gamecube(R)/PC and go out there and loose the 50+ LBS of fat I carry around with me each day and be the BIGGEST LOSER(R) not for my wife or the kids, or to make my parents proud, or anyone of the other 50 million+ reasons that I could do it.

I need to do it for me so that I can can get on the PD (that's Police Department, for those that have no idea what I'm rambling about) and do what it is that I have been dreaming about for the last 15 years.

Now some of you who check this every-once-in-a-while are going to go "where the crap did this come from?"

Goes to show you how really in touch you were with me. this has been my dream for the last 15 years is to get on the Huntsville P.D. and then go out and do what is right.

wish me luck I may not post for a while as My Computer will probably be turned off and I will be out running or at the gym or something else, especially since they took away my ability to type this at work.

Love you all and will post as I can but hopefully the within the next 3-6 posts I will be carrying a Huntsville PD badge and gun and the Car will be in my driveway.