well I had a very fruitful xmas season and got lots of music to keep me going in the studio months ahead.
this is whats on my playlist this last week:

- MGMT
- Brandi Carlile
- M.Ward
- Koop
- Psapp
- Persephone's Bees
- Grizzly Bear
- The Ditty Bops

check 'em out and let me know if you like any of these. My family who gave me the cd's had never heard of any of them of course. I think its supposed to be that way, means i'm cool or somethings.

well back to mold making.

well its a new year, for me of course this means nothing, the year begins and end in semesters with summer break in between.

Now begins the physical work for my thesis. For those you you dont know a maseters in fine art is in between a doctorate and a thesis, you have to get a BFA (a slightly bigger BA) and then enter an MFA program for three years (a slightly larger MA). It is the highest degree you can obtain in the studio arts so its fairly competitive and focuses on research.

research in the art world means making art. but in grad school it mean constantly explaining your ideas, questioning everything you do and having to defend your choices constantly. There are also other classes you have to take, art history and other studios but most of it is refining your work and finding why and how and eventually what you create.

All this culminates in a one person exhibition as well as a paper explaining the philosophies, techniques, and background of the show. You also have to defend your show to your committee. So I have a fairly large space to fill and this is with pottery which makes for difficult presentation concepts.

I am saying all of this to inform and to ask for prayers, i am struggling with anxiety of late. Doing this while applying to jobs in daunting and the uncertainty of what the show will be like as well as if i will be employed is well keeping me up at night.

yes, yes, YES! I am done with this semester. Now on to my thesis work and I am very excited.

Some fun news:
- drove through snow for the first time on saturday night. nearly wet my pants. I went so slow and had about 4 cars behind, one of which was the snow plow. I said to myself "read the license plate people!" I am so from southern california.

- bought the coolest christmas decorations ever! a 4 foot tall light up saguaro cactus for $10, best 10 bucks i've ever spent.

- took millie to see santa, I will post the picture later. It was great, she didnt pee on santa and looked at the camera when the lady said "Millie, where's the chicken?"

- i am flying home to california tomorrow! yippeee, i havent been home since last year and its been a big year with my dad and stuff. (he is doing well, work crisis but thats normal)

-I am so excited, Dave is going to visit me in cali for new years eve weekend. He hasnt really met my family, so this is big and will be so much fun b/c we havent seen much of eachother lately b/c he's been working 70 plus hours a week and i have been grading.

well i have to go clean my house, its scary .....

Philiipians 3:12 "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

In bible study we were talking about becoming and grwoing into what God has planned for us to be. People shared moments when they thought "oh this is so the way I am to go" but God would shut that door, maybe the next idea to until they found and they had a door open.

To hit home to a more practical application to me. Art is hard and full of self doubt. It is very easy to see why most artist are known for drinking , drugs and other forms of escaping. Somedays I realy dont want to put my heart and soul out there for people to judge and reject. Art is not a job you can ever just show up and make it through the day. So lately I have been doubting myself, pretty seriously and didnth ave the committee meeting i had hoped and was wondering if this was really for me, am I good enough? really good enough to make it succesfully(this is not a mainstream form of employment). SO upon hearing this verse i realized i needed to forget yesterady and all its rejection, and press on through the fear or future rejection. And then today..

i was accepted into a national juried showthat i have applied to every year since undergrad and i got 2 pieces into the show. There were 400 or so applicants and only 84 selected and i am 2 of that! i cannot tell you what it means to be validated by a natioal juried show, not matter how many times my mom says I am good. Thank you Lord cuase i needed that door.

When was a momement you pressed on and a door opened?

Go Play
Line Rider

If you read this
If your eyes are passing over this right now
Even if we don't speak too often
Please post a comment with a memory of you and me
It can be anything you want
Good or Bad
When finished, post this little paragraph on your blog
And be surprised by what people remember about you.