Dear Dan

at 07/20/06 8:33PM

Dear Dan,
I have worked as a creditor/collector and repossession officer for a lending company for more than 8 years. I love everything about my job. It�s always a very rewarding experience to exercise control over other people.
My problem results from the way friends and acquaintances perceive me. I often make friends easily until they find out about my profession (they rarely give me the time of day after that). I fear that I�ll never be able to marry and to raise a family because of this problem. However, I enjoy my job too much to consider a different line of work. How can I make people feel more comfortable about me?
William
Dear William,
If people consistently object to your job, I suggest that you aren�t associating with the right group of people. Rather than trying to make friends with communists like these, perhaps you should hang out with other professionals similar to yourself (corporate attorneys, IRS agents, car salesmen, etc.).
However, the most important thing you can do for yourself is to become extremely healthy. A famous man once suggested that healthiness overcomes personal shortcomings (meanness, for instance). Additionally, your personal health will symbolize to others the way that your work improves the health of the nation as a whole and they�ll recognize the valuable service that people like you provide.

If you have a problem, feel free to write: dan_duggin@hotmail.com. Although you are welcome to post comments, please email requests for help rather than post them on this page.

14-33 of 33 comments « prev 1 2 next »

Are you ready for 6 Flags?? :)

by snuggles at 09/09/06 11:35AM
If you'll update, I'll give you a cookie! :)

by snuggles at 09/26/06 1:00PM
by mattmanua at 10/18/06 2:44AM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! If THAT^ doesn't make you update, nothing will!!!

by mpettes at 10/26/06 12:49PM
Have you visited at New Salisbury church of Christ? My sister and b-i-l worship there. Gary Fisher is there preacher (I think he is in Brazil at the moment). It would probably be about a 20 min drive, but I think it would definately be worth checking out. They have a nice group of young people (a little younger than you) there that get together often for Bible studies.

by mpettes at 10/26/06 12:55PM
*their* sorry!!!

by mpettes at 10/26/06 12:55PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

by snuggles at 11/07/06 12:44PM
I know that you'll be doing a lot of updating now that your big test is over, right? :)

by snuggles at 11/13/06 2:49PM
Oh, and btw, I've been keeping a list of everything you said that you'd do when your test was over...you better get to work!

by snuggles at 11/13/06 2:50PM
Oh dear! Keeping a list and holding you to it sounds just like a wife!

by shaneg at 11/15/06 10:20PM
Krista posted...so I'll say congrats on here now. :D

by amandochka at 12/03/06 2:00AM
Congrats, Dan! :D

by sweetpea at 12/03/06 4:59PM
congratulations!!!

by nickel at 12/03/06 6:32PM
I guess your friends list should now say, "My Future Wifey".

by shaneg at 12/05/06 6:08PM
hey dan this is caleb smithson, how have you been?

by bluegrass_boy at 02/17/07 8:16PM
Hey Dan this is Jacob Smithson.

by cowboy_jake at 02/27/07 9:13AM
Happy Wedding Day, Dan!

by amandochka at 06/01/07 10:02AM
'Twas a wonderful wedding...still smiling :)

by sweetpea at 06/02/07 9:24PM
Happy Birthday...it's really bad when the same post has been up long enough for a 2nd b-day to go by. ;)

by amandochka at 11/07/07 10:35PM
^^^ Yeah, we can start wishing happy birthday to his post.

by shaneg at 11/08/07 7:01AM

Dear Dan

at 07/11/06 8:09PM

Dear Dan,
Recently, I went to a fast food restaurant with my family. When I ordered my drink, which was an iced tea, I requested that they leave out the lemon wedge that usually comes in the drink. However, when I received it, I was disappointed to find two lemon wedges in it. I promptly showed the cashier her mistake. She replied, "Fine", and stuck her hand in the cup and took the lemon wedges out. I politely said, "Please give me a clean drink." She then hysterically shrieked that her hand was clean. Then I was fed up and ready to leave so I requested a refund. That's when she really lost control. While she ranted and yelled, she tried to pull out some of my hair and then threw the contents of the glass into my face! I quietly took my family home. Ever since then, I�ve been worried by the disturbing thought: Could I have been in the wrong?
Shelly
Dear Shelly,
Yes, and of course you were. From the description, I�d say this woman was undergoing deep emotional or mental trauma. For example, perhaps her pet cat had recently died, or maybe she had recently filed her income taxes. Research shows that the best way to handle someone in such a state is to find a way to be helpful. Instead of complicating matters you should have said, "I'm so sorry about your cat. May I vacuum your house? How about I mow your lawn?" Not only will the suffering person feel better, you won�t be as likely to lose your hair.

If you have a problem, feel free to write: dan_duggin@hotmail.com. Although you are welcome to post comments, please email requests for help rather than post them on this page.

Welcome back!! Perhaps she had used a different fabric softner and her pants were riding up on her. That can upset anyone!

by snuggles at 07/11/06 10:10PM
I agree. Shelly should have been understanding since she too is a woman. Everybody knows that a woman can fly off the handle at the drop of dime for no apparent reason whatsoever. Women!

by shaneg at 07/11/06 10:57PM
hey Dan...nice to see that you are connected to the world again

by amandochka at 07/12/06 2:28AM
YAY! Dan Lives!

by mattmanua at 07/12/06 2:31AM
Hello, Dan! I hope you are feeling better!

by undomiel at 07/13/06 12:46PM

Dear Dan

at 06/04/06 11:24PM

Dear Dan,
My husband, Ron, is about to drive me crazy. Last week, I found him putting my good dishes in the washing machine to clean them. Although I nearly had a heart attack, I politely explained that the dishes should go in the dishwasher. He became angry and wouldn�t speak to me for the rest of the day. Yesterday, I found him driving his riding lawn mower through the living room. I screamed at him to get the lawn mower out of the house because the blades were cutting huge gashes in the carpet. He immediately began to cry and said that he couldn�t do anything right. There are hundreds of other examples that I could mention but I think you can understand my situation. He is so sensitive that I can�t tell him that he�s done something wrong without hurting his feelings. I told his parents about his behavior, but, naturally, they took his side. Could there be something wrong with Ron�s mind? What can I do about him?
Julie
Dear Julie,
It appears that Ron suffers from a classic case of middle child�s syndrome. Although there are many symptoms of this disease, the most common symptoms are poor carpentry skills, extreme argumentative attitudes, and frequent nausea. It is not impossible for Ron to overcome this disease. Dr. William J. Young of Portsmouth University overcame his severe case of middle child�s syndrome to become a world renowned astronomer, physicist, and the first person to swim across the English Channel wearing a straitjacket. The best way to help Ron is to be supportive of him. The next time he really messes something up, don�t criticize him but try to help him focus on the positive aspects of what he�s done. Although he may never completely recover from his disease, he can still live a fairly normal life if you make the effort to support him properly.
If you have a problem, feel free to write: dan_duggin@hotmail.com. Although you are welcome to post comments, please email requests for help rather than post them on this page.

haha...i always look forward to these updates.

by uncle_jesse at 06/04/06 11:28PM
one more thing....not like it matters, but arent you the middle child too dan?

by uncle_jesse at 06/04/06 11:29PM
LOL

by southernsunshine at 06/04/06 11:46PM
Why yes dear, what a fine job you are doing cutting up the carpet!

by mattmanua at 06/04/06 11:54PM
I thought middle children were supposed to be the ones that were easy to get along with?

by summersilk at 06/05/06 12:27AM
yes, i was going to point out the same thing...how do we know you aren't suffering from middle child syndrome;) I want Julie to write back and list the hundreds of other examples!

by curtisamy at 06/05/06 6:30AM
I too happen to be a middle child. It is a difficult syndrom to deal with. Just the other day my wife made me weep when she scolded me for using her hair brush to clean the toilet.

by shaneg at 06/05/06 6:57AM
Middle children are such problems. :)

by snuggles at 06/05/06 6:18PM
haha.. that's good.

by rhianna at 06/06/06 11:24AM
keely is always mowing the living room, we're working on her doing it in straight lines so maybe our landlord will see it as a new interior decorating trend. you middle children are so creative

by nickel at 06/06/06 3:54PM
I LOVE YOU!!!

by snuggles at 06/12/06 9:54PM
Okay, someone needs to hurry up and get their interent hooked up!! Grrr!

by snuggles at 06/29/06 10:43AM
So that's why no update lately. I was beginning to wonder.

by crackle at 06/29/06 5:30PM
ha....did you get the inspiration for that...being the middle child?

by amandochka at 06/30/06 5:30PM
I happen to know that Dan0mite has text messaging hotline to his sweetheart. He could text the column to her and she could post here. Now there's an idea.

by shaneg at 06/30/06 7:08PM
i am anxiously awaiting the next installment

by uncle_jesse at 06/30/06 10:33PM
Dear Dan, are you planning to play fantasy football

by austinator at 07/06/06 6:36PM

Dear Dan

at 05/24/06 10:40AM

Dear Dan,
I frequently have to travel by airplane for business. Many of these trips require me to travel with my coworker, Bruce. Bruce would drive any traveler crazy. He talks to me when I�m trying to sleep, he spills food on me, his breath and body odor nearly make me puke, and he tries to corner me into answering personal questions. Worst of all, Bruce is very sensitive. I�m afraid to tell him how annoying he is for fear that I�ll hurt his feelings and gain a poor reputation at work. I don�t think I can manage another trip with him. How should I handle this?

Mitchell
Dear Mitchell
More than likely, Bruce is going through a difficult time in his life. His constant talking results from having no family. He spills food on you to get your attention because you�ve stopped listening to him. This is also the reason he talks while you�re trying to sleep. You should be flattered by his asking personal questions because he thinks you are an interesting person. His body odor and bad breath indicate that he was orphaned and not taught proper hygiene.
It's your responsibility to fix Bruce's social failures. I ascribe to the famous saying, �The greatest gift is see yourself as other's see you.� Next time you and Bruce have to travel together, arrange for another of your coworkers to go along (pay his way if you must). Show Bruce how annoying he is by exaggeratingly mimicking Bruce to your other traveling companion, �Ralph.� Rather than merely spill your food on Ralph, dump your entire plate on him. Eat as many garlic and onions based foods as you can and breathe in Ralph�s direction. Bruce will see what a pest you�re being and will be mortified to realize that he has done all of these things to you.

If you have a problem, feel free to write: dan_duggin@hotmail.com. Although you are welcome to post comments, please email requests for help rather than post them on this page.

sounds like bruce is a sissy. a quick right hook to the jaw will solve all of his problems.

by uncle_jesse at 05/24/06 1:21PM
As a gesture of credibility, I believe Dear Dan should buy the plane ticket for Mitchell's other traveling companion, "Ralph".

by shaneg at 05/24/06 5:33PM
I think Mitchell should try and get Bruce fired by spreading lies about him. This would definately solve all his problems.

by curtisamy at 05/25/06 3:23AM
I don't see the problem, I act exactly like Bruce does when I travel. What's your point?

by snuggles at 05/25/06 11:22PM
Bruce's condition is technically called "craving attention syndrome." He needs to learn how to channel his energy in a socially-friendly way.

by dear_dan at 05/26/06 12:31AM

Dear Dan

at 05/14/06 6:56PM

Dear Dan,
My wife, Sandy, and I have a two-year old son Alex. For almost a year, Sandy has treated Alex as though she doesn�t really like him. She seems to consider caring for Alex as a drudgery. She often carries him by one foot, upside down. Also, I found out recently that when she takes him with her to ride in the car, she puts Alex in the trunk! I saw her getting him out on a hot summer day and Alex was covered in sweat. I could give more examples but I think you can see that she seems either to lack natural motherliness or she cares nothing about him. I�m starting to worry about leaving him alone with her. Am I right to be concerned?

Worried Dad
Dear Worried,
It is perfectly safe for Alex to ride in the trunk. Certainly, heat is not a concern since children survive in much hotter places like the Amazon and Africa. Carrying Alex by the foot is not normal but I don�t think you should assume that Sandy doesn�t like Alex. Have you ever thought about the possibility that Alex has caused this tension between the two of them? Remember if Alex is going to make friends in life, he has to show traits of friendship, himself. I worry about Alex�s social development since he is having trouble making friends with his own mother (even at the cutest stage of his life). You need to show Alex how to make friends. In the meantime, try to find out how he upset his mother.

If you have a problem, feel free to write: dan_duggin@hotmail.com. Although you are welcome to post comments, please email requests for help rather than post them on this page.

You know so much about parenthood. You are making me proud!

by snuggles at 05/15/06 5:53PM
Yeah. I agree with her. All you need to do is get married. Then you can be a great daddy. (by the way, no pressure)

by shaneg at 05/15/06 6:01PM
Oops!! I guess I can still have some fun! (Like beating you at golf!!)

by snuggles at 05/15/06 8:21PM
I always rode in the trunk in the car and I turned out ok, what's this guy so worried about? good response to worried dad ;)

by curtisamy at 05/16/06 7:47AM

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