October 26th, 2009 Dear Diary:
I do not like this pen. Ah. That is better. "What does it matter?" I have heard this phrase too much in the past months. Sometimes it makes me stop and think. Most times my response is obviously blinding me. "It just matters." As I sit on my bed and listen to him play piano, my mind begins to wander. Wander to last night when I left and the note I came home to. "Inevitability" does not pertain to us. No, we are much more complex then that. The only thing I have found to be truly inevitable in this life, my life, is that one day we will all die. I left last night to find an answer to a question. And that answer was a bold, clear, no. I cannot. I sit here warm on my bed. The weather outside; a tad less inviting. I need this calm. The calm I typically find as I go outside in weather such as this and see right in front of my face the evidence of my working lungs. I want to feel serene. I want to feel the cleansing dance of the raindrops on my vulnerable face. I want to feel the drops' dance of excitement as they are released from the cloud's grasp on my skin. To be free. If only for a moment. What a wonderful feeling. I can feel their freedom soak into my sin. My soul longs for it. It drinks it up until I am completely full. I get filled with exhilaration and excitement that my body can no longer contain. I take a breath, and the ecstasy I have stolen from the clouds' sudden mutiny of precipitation, I begin to dance. I can feel my hair on my face as it becomes a pathway for the mutineers leading them to wash away my cares along with my makeup. I have not only achieved my serene but so much more. I can feel content in that moment because I am free. I begin to twirl and my body is enchanted. I feel only happiness and love. I feel like if I could capture this moment's emotions and bottle it up, all of these problems would go away. I train myself to believe that all moments such as this inevitably come to an end. A distraction. My serene is gone and the sun comes out once more to retrieve the freedom he thinks I have selfishly taken from the clouds. Once again, I am back to hoping and wishing. Surely the lakes, rivers, ponds, puddles, and ocean cannot be as selfish as I. Come on sun, gather more freedom then set it free for I long to dance again.




My answer was no, I cannot live without you.

My love.



-Elizabeth Ross

This is so cool. Donna showed me (: See for yourself.



Here's the link.

http://www.ted.com/talks/view/id/457


Enjoy!

Ok so I'm only taking 12 credits (which qualifies as full-time)
in community college and I know that's not that much compared
to people going to universities and taking 30 credits or more,
but its enough for me to be lacking of a social life anymore.

I absolutely love it though.
People are there because they WANT to be there.
Not because they're forced to go by law.
The atmosphere is totally different and you really are
treated like an adult.
You call your professor's by their first name not their title
and last name.

The only thing I'm not too crazy about is all the reading.
Each chapter is never less than 40 pages long and I usually get
a couple chapters assigned to me per class.

Here's my schedule:
MWF: 11 a.m.- Interpersonal Communication
1 p.m.-Writing 121
MW: 2 p.m.-Intro to Abnormal Psychology
Tue.: 6-9 p.m.-Working with Individuals and Families


I love all of my classes but writing, abnormal psych, and IC are my favourites. I'm not too crazy about my three hour long class on Tuesday nights but oh well.

After about 2 1/2 years of writers block, I'm getting my touch back.
My writing teacher loves me!
(I'm really not trying to brag AT ALL, it just made me feel good)
He told me its hard to believe I'm the youngest person in the class
and that he loves reading what I write. "Very inspirational"
(:

I see a double major coming on...

Psychology and Literature most likely once I begin my 4 years
at OSU.

(: Oh I feel so useful!
I plan on taking the summer term off so I can get a full time
job and save up money to move out for fall term then go back
full time.

I'll try to update more =p


-Liz

In my last blog I was living with Audrey. I'm still at the same
apartment complex, but different roommates.
I now work at Carolina Wings && Rib House.
I'm a food runner/Hostess for now and will be a server in March.

A lot has gone on so I'm not sure what to update about.
Thanksgiving was ok. I was upset I wasn't in Rhode Island but oh well.
Christmas was hard but I spent it with Stephen and his family.
Stephen might be going to California to finish up high school
with his aunt and uncle and in that case I will be relocating to the
west coast until April but we are still waiting on the call back from his
relatives.

New Years was good. I worked New Years eve and we were really busy.
That night Stephen and I hung out at my apartment and we played
games and then played video games.

The weather here has been weird. The majority has been in the 70s
with it dropping down to the 40s at night. It's also been getting
very foggy at night here which is kind of scary.
Other nights its gets in the teens with the high being in the 40s
but that has only happened once or twice.

I have my lip pierced now... 3 times on one side.

It's weird to think I will be turning 18 in 3 months. Kind of
scary I'm sure for my family. I feel like I should be turning 21.

Well, like I said before, I'm not sure what to talk about so that's
basically the jist of my life as of now.

I'll update more later when I have more interesting things to talk
about.

-Liz


p.s.- In my blurb you might notice the "mannah-mannah" reference. Stephen likes to replace the last syllable of the second 'mannah' with a word of his choice in his daily vocabulary. You should try it sometime. It's pretty funny.

Currently I'm living with my friend Audrey and her mother in their apartment. I work for my friend Jordan's mom at her coffee shop and am looking for a second job. The coffee shop is only open from 7-2 every morning. So an evening or afternoon job would be good.

It's starting to feel like fall which is nice for South Carolina. Its just really windy. The leaves get blown across the road a lot and I always think im about to run over a small animal.

I really like working at the coffee shop. It's usually people in their 60s that come early in the morning then more towards the early afternoon its couples in their 20s-30s. Its a good crowd and they have very interesting conversations. Mostly about politics. I was told I look like Sarah Paylin (sp?) Apparently she might be the new vice president or something. I dont like politics so I dont keep up with that stuff.

Today I painted a box haha. I know it sounds weird but Audrey keeps paint and varnish in her room and she buys little lock boxes and she paints them. It was fun and killed about an hour.

I'm still pretty sick but my fever has gone away and my voice is coming back.

Please pray for my friend Kristi. She's in the hospital right now and might need surgery for her kidneys. She has a lot of medical problems and now the Dr's are looking into surgery just to see what they can find because blood tests all come back negative and so does every other test so they're running out of options.

Last night I started Metal Gear Solid 4. So far, its pretty amazing. Very addicting. AND you get an IPOD in the game! haha. I love it.

For any of you candy corn lovers: Audrey introduced me to Brach*s brand pumpkins. They're just like candy corn but so much better for some reason. They're about $1.20 at walmart. Go get a bag and tell me what you think.

...I just found a pig fetus on Audrey's computer desk...

ANYWAY


It's weird to think I'm going to be 18 in about 5 months. I guess my life is really just kind of starting. This spring will have a lot of new beginnings and things to look forward to. My mom will hopefully be coming out, I should be starting college, and I will be getting ink. I'm so excited!

Audrey came back in and told me that her ex boyfriend Stephen stole the pig fetus from the biology lab at school and gave it to her. Only my mom and I would not be surprised by that.

Well, I'm done boring everyone with this pointless blog.