So here's a conversation that occurred between Teda, myself, and Adelaide today.

Adelaide: What's that smell?
Mommy: Daddy's stinky toots.
[Daddy giggling immaturely]
Adelaide: Oh...and it smells like trash?

I love that little girl!

My wife calls me at work today and the first words out of her mouth are "You won't believe what just happened!" This is not completely out of the ordinary seeing as how we have a two and a half year old daughter, but I was not prepared for what I was about to hear.

My wife was drying her hair when my daughter showed up in the doorway stating that she had made a mess. She was naked from the waist down and had blue acrylic paint on her hands and legs. Common sense and experience would tell you that if there's paint on her body, then there's paint somewhere else in the house. My wife cleaned her up and locked her in her room and begun the investigation. There were big spots of blue paint on the carpet in our bedroom, which appeared to be the "scene of the crime". As my wife made her way downstairs to fetch the wet/dry vac, she noticed that there were smaller blue spots all over the house. As she was trying to figure out how in the world our daughter could make such a huge mess in such a short time, she noticed that the cat door was painted completely blue, too. Just as things are coming together in her head, our now blue cat walks around the corner. As soon as this came out of her mouth, I couldn't help but laugh (and very loud, at that), which was obviously not the thing to do because she started crying on the phone. To make a long story short, my wonderful wife got the carpet all cleaned and even managed to throw the cat in the shower and get most of the paint off him before it dried. I wonder if our daughter is still locked in her room...

So everyone seems to have posted lyrics on their blogs at some point or another, and I have decided to follow suit by posting lyrics on mine. The following is a song that has reached the depths of my soul and has touched my life on a number of levels. It is both an inspiration for me to keep pressing on throughout life's constant struggles, as well as a standard that I use to measure my accomplishments as a husband, father, and friend. I hope that this song brings you as much joy and satisfaction as it has me.

Pump up the jam
Pump it up
While your feet are stompin'
And the jam is pumpin'
Look at here the crowd is jumpin'
Pump it up a little more
Get the party going on the dance floor
Seek us that's where the party's at
And you'll find out if you're too bad
I don't want a place to stay
Get your booty on the floor tonight
Make my day
I don't want a place to stay
Get your booty on the floor tonight
Make my day
Make my day
Make my day
Make my day
Make my day
Yo!
Pump up the jam
Pump it up
While your feet are stompin'
And the jam is pumpin'
Look at here the crowd is jumpin'
Pump it up a little more
Get the party going on the dance floor
Seek us that's where the party's at
And you'll find out if you're too bad
I don't want a place to stay
Get your booty on the floor tonight
Make my day
I don't want a place to stay
Get your booty on the floor tonight
Make my day
Make my day
Make my make my make make my day
Make my day
Make my day
Make my make my make make my day
Yo!
Pump up the jam pump it up
A pump it up yo pump it
Pump up the jam pump it up
A pump it up yo pump it
Pump up the jam pump it up
A pump it up yo pump it
Pump up the jam
Pump it pump it pump it pump it, Yo!
Pump up the jam
A pump up the jam
Pump up the jam
Pump it up a pump it pump it pump it
Pump up the jam
Pump up the jam
Pump up the jam
Pump it pump it pump it pump it pump

Unfortunately, space prohibits me from posting the rest of the lyrics. If you enjoyed those posted above, then you should definitely check out the rest of the song. The lyricist continues to astonish the listener with his ability to use common words to create a feeling that surpasses any verbal description. Truly marvelous...thank you!

So my wife frequently watches our three-year old nephew. Yesterday, he and my two-year old daughter were playing in a room together when she suddenly started crying. My wife walks over to the room in time to see him dart out. Here's the conversation that followed:

My wife: What happened?
Mason: Adelaide was pulling on my ear. She hurt me.
My wife: So why is she crying?
Mason: I don't know.
My wife: Mason, why is she crying?
Mason: Um...because I think someone hit her.
My wife: Someone hit her?
Mason: Yeah, someone hit her...but not me.

I'm beginning to understand how my parents always seemed to be able to tell that I was lying when I was really young. I'm still trying to figure out how they kept such a straight face during those times, though.

I've been tagged by David! It took me a while, but I finally found six things about me that may seem odd to some, although I'm confident that nobody can be closer to normal than me. Here goes!

1.) I enjoy polishing shiny objects, especially kitchen faucets. I mostly keep this within the confines of my own house, but have been caught shining other people's faucets before...AKWARD!!!!

2.) I do not sleep well unless I have an object very close by that can be effectively used as a weapon (and no, my wife can not be effectively used as a weapon). I have a ridiculous fear of burglaries, which I think partially stems from the information that I have acquired due to #5 on my list.

3.) I like to tie knots. I don't think I'm very good at it, though, because when attempting to put my skills to practical use, I usually take forever and end up being made fun of by those around me. That's cool, though, because I'll have my revenge as soon as I figure out how to make a noose...

4.) I don't usually eat fries or potato chips. Some people have to eat chips with sandwiches or fries with a burger, but I've never been a big fan of either. Oddly enough, I usually get the value meals at the fast food places just because it's such a good deal. Most of the time, my fries will go to waste. It's not that I think they taste bad, I just don't care for them.

5.) I am fascinated with any sort of lock manipulation. The more I learn about it, the more I realize that locks are only effective at keeping honest people out of your house or car. The majority of locks can easily be bypassed in one way or another, and for some reason I think this is cool.

6.) I have a coin collection. I don't think I need to expound on this.

That's all for me. I think I'll tag Matty-boy, Matty-boy, Matty-boy, Jason, Manly Thanly, and Abidee-Babidee. Here are the rules:

The Rules: Each player of this game starts with the "6 odd or weird things/habits about you". People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 6 things, and state this rule clearly. At the end, choose 6 people that you're tagging and list their names. Leave them each a comment telling them that they've been tagged.