NINJA HAULER: 2005 Nissan Xterra - $12900 (Ronan / Lake County)
OK, let me start off by saying this Xterra is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a vehicle to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this Nissan would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.

It was never intended to drive to the mall so you can pick up that adorable shirt at Abercrombie & Fitch that you had your eye on. It wasn't meant to transport you to yoga class or Linens & Things. No, that's what your Prius is for. If that's the kind of car you're looking for, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now. I mean it. Just stop.

This car was engineered by 3rd degree ninja super-warriors in the highest mountains of Japan to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. They didn't even consider superfluous nancy boy amenities like navigation systems (real men don't get lost), heated leather seats (a real man doesn't let anything warm his butt), or On Star (real men don't even know what the heck On Star is).

No, this brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a 265 HP engine to outrun the cops. It's got special blood/gore resistant upholstery. It even has a first-aid kit in the back. You know what the first aid kit has in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you're operating on yourself. The Xterra also has an automatic transmission so if you're being chased by Libyan terrorists, you'll still be able to shoot your machine gun out the window and drive at the same time. It's saved my bacon more than once.

It has room for you and the four hotties you picked up on the way to the gym to blast your pecs and hammer your glutes. There's a tow hitch to pull your 50 caliber anti-Taliban, self cooling machine gun. I also just put in a new windshield to replace the one that got shot out by The Man.


My price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $12,900, but I'll entertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don't walk up and tell me you'll give me $5,000 for it. That's liable to earn you a Burmese-roundhouse-sphincter-kick with a follow up three fingered eye-jab. Would it hurt? Heck yeah. Let's just say you won't be the prettiest guy at the Coldplay concert anymore.

There's only 69,000 miles on this four-wheeled hellcat from Planet Kick***. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo.

Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it's a rugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stunt double, then contact me. I might be out hang-gliding or BASE jumping or just chilling with my ladies , but I'll get back to you. And when I do, we'll talk about a price over a nice glass of Schmidt while we listen to Johnny Cash.

To sweeten the deal a little, I'm throwing in this pair of MC Hammer pants for the man with rippling quads that can't fit into regular pants. Yeah, you heard me. FREE MC Hammer pants.

Rock on.

Need a new post so I figured I'd fill you in on my commute. It’s been about 3 months since I began riding my bike to work. My office is about 15 miles by car but I try to stay off the busiest streets so my bike route is about 17.5 miles. Usually it takes me between 1:15 to 1:30 on the bike. Driving takes about 30-45 min.

work commute 2 - Acworth to Marietta
When I first started considering it, I wasn't sure exactly how it would work out but the idea wouldn't go away. The wife was completely against it at first (understandably) but got used to the idea the more that I kept looking into it. I had an old 12 speed road bike that was being used only occasionally. I added a rear rack and a trunk bag to carry a few items (lunch, phone, mini-pump, spare tube, repair kit, bike lock, etc.) and a red "blinky" light to make sure I can be seen easily. Janice has been real supportive since I began commuting. She alters her schedule in the mornings and evenings that I ride. Since I need to leave the house earlier she's not always able to go running before I leave. And she'll sometimes feed the kids before I get home but wait to eat until we can sit down together, even if it means after the kids are in bed.

I'll try to answer for you some of the many questions that I'm sure you may have.

Do you ride every day?No I don't ride every day. I'll take the bike 2-3 times a week. So far it's worked out pretty good. I try to do T-Th or M-W-F depending on the weather and which one works better with our family schedule. 3x a week is fine if it’s M-W-F but T-W-Th makes F-Sa-Su no fun.

How do you keep from being all sweaty once you get to work?The days that I drive I bring extra clothes and I leave those at my desk. My office building has a health club so when I bike, I just grab some clothes and head to the showers. The shower facilities were the last piece of the puzzle as far as trying to figure out how to make it work. Admittedly this is much easier for men than it would be for women. Can't imagine having to worry about hair and make-up after everything else. Have to make some concessions with regard to office attire but not many. Luckily my office is business casual so khakis and a polo shirt are all that's needed. I normally just keep 1-2 pair of pants and 2-3 shirts there and I can usually make these last for a couple weeks, especially if they are that awesome wrinkle free fabric! Seriously, who's gonna remember if I wear the same 2 shirts every Tues & Thurs, right? Along the same lines, I learned a long time ago (college) that a towel can last up to a month before it starts to smell a little funky. It’s pretty much just wiping clean water off your body. When I get back to my desk I just hang it on my coat hook so it can air dry during the day. To be honest, it comes home about once every couple weeks. Janice is mortified. I don't expect the ladies to understand but it works for me.

Do people think you're weird?Yes, I get a lot of questions from co-workers. Most of the guys that know me are used to it by now so they don't bat an eye. But it never fails, most days I'll end up sharing an elevator with someone I don't know, dripping with sweat and decked out in spandex. I try not to make eye contact unless they speak -- usually they do. Otherwise it can make for an uncomfortable elevator ride.

Is it worth it?It's tough getting up early -- not a morning person and don't get my first cup of coffee till I get to my desk -- but I am seeing some benefits. I've dropped between 5-10 lbs. without changing what I eat. I'm burning about 760 calories on each ride, so roughly 1500 both ways. My conditioning is vastly improved over the last few months too. I've been mt. biking for years but was never a real strong rider like some of the guys I knew. It was hard to improve much when I was only riding once a week. Now I'm riding with relative ease some of the trails that I struggled on for years. I think I'm saving a little bit of money too. I'm not spending as much on gas and oil changes, but I'm spending a little more on bike repairs and upgrades and other commuting "necessities".

Well, that's about it. Remember... share the road

It was hard going back to work after spending all last week at the beach. The weather was spectacular. Everyone really had a great time swimming and catching marine hermit crabs. Tori got to participate in several educational programs at Myrtle Beach State Park where she earned another patch for her Brownie vest! Even mom got to relax.

Here's a few pics.




Hope you're having a great week.

Wouldn'tcha know it... I just sold my ski equipment and bought stock in Coppertone and now this